Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Mystery solved

“The case of the evil refrigerator”

For months I have been dealing with a refrigerator that from time to time decided to ruin everything in it by slipping into a deep freeze mode. I have had to throw away tons of lettuce, tomatoes cucumbers and many other vegetables, not to mention other foods that just no longer looked appealing after being frozen by this evil machine. I was unable to figure this case out myself so I knew I needed to do something drastic. I decided to assume the identity of the greatest detective that ever lived. As a child I loved watching him on TV and knew he could get to the bottom of this case. I am now Charlie Chan.




Chan: Greetings kind people.

#1 Son: Look like open and shut case to me Pop. Just a faulty refrigerator.

Chan: Not so hasty #1. Why would refrigerator deliberately ruin food? End up in trash heap. Perhaps we start with suspects. They are:

Wife, #2 son, Mother in Law, Trusted neighbor Ann, Kitty cat

#1 Son: Ok Pop. Lets throw the book at Mom. She probably just wants a new refrigerator. Why not just buy a new one?

Chan: It is a new refrigerator #1. Confucius say. “life like poo sandwich. The more bread you have the less poo you get” Unfortunately, we have little bread and lots of poo. Need to find real guilty party.

#1 Son: Ok Pop how about Mother in Law? Why would she do this?

Chan: Sometimes Mother in Law need no reason. Confucius say: “Mother in law like unmarked thermometer. Sometimes leave bad taste in mouth” Not logical that she would do this.

#1 Son: Why not Pop?

Chan: Butter pecan ice cream by temperature knob not touched. Impossible situation.

Chan: Lets examine Trusted neighbor Ann.

#1 Son: Pop shouldn’t we leave that to a doctor?

Chan: Only figure of speech #1. May get doctor to determine if you really my son. Now pay attention. Ann possibly turn down thermostat to make food spoil then sell lots of wine to fill refrigerator, Make lots of money.

#1 Son: But Pop you don’t keep it long enough to need refrigeration.

Chan: Good point #1.

Chan: Kitty has motive. If food spoil, we throw out, then kitty gets to eat, .but not able to open door by self.

#1 Son: Maybe he got the other cats to help?

Chan: #1 your brain like soup sandwich. Good ingredients but really messy

Chan: That just leave #2 son.

#1 Son: But we questioned him and he said he didn’t touch the refrigerator control knob.

Chan: Lets ask again different way. #2 have you been adjusting the temperature knob in the refrigerator?

#2 Son: No Pop I swear.

Chan: So you didn’t touch any knobs at all on this refrigerator?

#2 Son: No Pop I didn’t touch the refrigerator knob (big pause) I only adjust the freezer knob down because someone keeps turning it back up.

Chan: What can I say but “Case solved”.

Ok I am back to normal now, if that is possible. I hope you liked my little journey back into TV land. Have a great day. Oh and for you youngsters, Charlie Chan and Jackie Chan are not the same person. :)

Greg

7 comments:

Wanda said...

Oh I used to watch that show faithfully...You did a great job! Accents and all! Thanks for a big smile today!!

Beth said...

Ha!!! That was great! At lease Chan figured it out, thanks to son!!!

Kati said...

ROFL Glad you solved the case of the faulty refridgerator!

USAincognito said...

LOL. Too funny!! At least you were able to solve the "mystery" of the freezing fridge! ;)

snowelf said...

That is too funny! I especially loved the "soup sandwich line"

--snow

just me said...

Funny stuff. My son and I go back and forth with the settings on the fridge. He turns it up, I turn it down.

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