Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The truth is...........

The reason that I haven’t been posting much lately is that I have been really tired and I have been sleeping a lot. It’s not due to depression though. I think it is an allergic reaction to our cat. You see, he has been inside a lot lately after his attack. I really think there are a lot of dogs hanging around the neighborhood so we keep him inside for his protection. The reason that all these dogs are hanging around is because there seems to be several foxes living in the woods by our house. I am sure that they are there due to the increased number of birds, mice, snakes and other vermin that have taken up residence around our house. The “fox food” is here because there is still a lot of green vegetation around that would normally be brown this time of year and it is all due to global warming. So you see the reason that I haven’t been blogging much lately is due to global warming. And that’s the truth.

Yesterday I was thinking about my youth and all the things that my parents taught me. They taught me how to speak, write, swim, hunt, fish, draw, ride a bike, drive a car and many more things than I could ever mention here in this post. But there is one thing that they didn’t teach me. I learned it myself and in fact I can honestly say that I was born with the ability to do it and many of you were too. Even though I was born with the ability to do it, and did it the first time by myself, with no formal training at all, I did over the years learn to perfect this skill to the point where it is today. I am talking about the ability to lie. Now before I take all credit away from my parents, I am sure even though they didn’t teach me how to do it, they possibly pushed me into doing it the first time.

Picture this:

A small child is sitting quietly in his bedroom. (Too quiet for his own good.) The parent walks in and sees him sitting there with a crayon in hand, a box of crayons sitting beside him and a wall covered with crayon scribbles. Now what is the first thing out of that parent’s mouth? “Did you write on this wall son?" Now also imagine that the parent sounds upset, and they are so much larger than the child and the child knows this so he is left with only two options. Tell the truth and face possible consequences or lie and try to talk his way out of it. From a child’s perspective option two looks pretty good. And the beauty if lying is after the first time, it keeps getting easier.

The teenage years are difficult but they can be made easier by a telling a little white lie or two. That friend that you really don't want to hang out with can be held at bay with a fake sickness or maybe a “my father says I can’t come over” or even an “I have to watch my brother” excise. I remember my girlfriend in high school once pointed to this really attractive “it” girl and asked me if that girl was prettier than she was. What was I supposed to say? I lied. So the teenage years really are the developmental years when it comes to lying. By the time a person reaches adult hood they stand ready to blend right in with society and its acceptance of lying.

It really amazes me how accepted lying is these days. Think about it. When a person is put on the witness stand the first thing they make them do is place their hand on a Bible and swear to tell the truth. (I know there are alternatives these days but the point is the same) People have to be reminded and encouraged not to lie. This whole concept is ridiculous because the reason that people are in court in the first place is because someone is lying. Think about it. If no one lied, then there would be no reason to go to court. People would simply say: I did it or it’s my fault.

And to make matters worse and ease society’s conscience, we have come up with less offensive terms and reasons for lying. Here are a few: Omitting the truth, Fib, Partial truth, Little white lie, It’s what they wanted to hear, They never asked, I wasn’t under oath, It was for their own good etc etc. And the reason that we came up with these alternative names for lying is so that we can rank our lies in order to make some of them sound OK.

The problem though comes when we start making those little fibs acceptable. Sure they are seemingly insignificant but they tend to grow. In order to cover up that little fib, we may need to tell a little larger lie to make things work. Then the next thing we know, we have to make up bigger and bigger lies to cover the previous ones and before you know it, we are doing nothing but covering up what started out to be a little fib. If we continue to let our lies grow, sooner or later we get confused or our lies become so complex that we slip up and oops, we get caught. We are labeled “ a liar.” Have you ever told someone that a dish they prepared was good (when it wasn’t) and later had that person make it again just for you. Remember having to force that food down. MMMMMMMMM Yummy. But if you were a quick thinker you came back with, "Oh, thank you but I am not hungry right now." Then shortly after that you forgot about the dish and asked the same person of they wanted to go out and get something to eat. Oops, caught.

The truth is that to some extent we are all liars. We have all told lies at one time or another in our lives. They may have been little white lies or maybe even biggies. I try not to lie unless it means hurting someone’s feelings. I guess that makes it ok, or does it? Just something to think about. What’s your opinion on this subject?

Have a great day,


Sharon said...

Yes My friend I agree with you, a lie is a lie. I will lie to not hurt someone, and I try really hard not to do that, but a lie is a lie! But yes there are so many liars out there, and it can be hard to believe anyone anymore.
I know about the sickness I have had the flu for 2 weeks now and I'm over it. But today I really feel better. I hope you do to soon.
Great Post
Have a blessed New Year

Sharon said...

I totally agree with you Greg. Of course we have all told lies but nothing will bust up a relationship faster than an outright lie.

I'm also with you on the allergies. I never had those until after my surgery in June. Then I took on several different allergies, which I think is odd. Right now I think I am reacting to some young hens I am raising up in my laundry room. I'll sure be glad when the girls are big enough to go to the coop.

Anyway, I do enjoy reading everything you write.

Have a blessed day, Greg!

God's girl said...

Lies destroy families, relationships, jobs, ministries, yet how often do we do it?

The Bible says, "Thou shalt not lie." Yet, I don't know anyone who's never broken that commandment. We justify as you said in one way or another.

I think this is a journey each person has to go on with God, and let Him define the boundaries there.

I do know, the more lies that are told, the easier it is to do it. This is a hard one...

Sister Angie said...

Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive...I know it all too well, esp during my adolescent years.

All have sinned and fall short, but while we were still sinners Christ died for us. This was great news to me when I finally discovered that in my 20's.

Perhaps the only thing worse is believing a lie. When we meditate on God's word (the Truth), and speak the Truth, we can live honest and upright lives. It is the only way to have victory over this ugly sin that plagues us all.

I hope your allergies get better. Keep up the fish oil and acidophilus.

Monogram Queen said...

I agree, I don't like lying and won't lie maliciously but I will lie in order not to hurt someone's feelings or good manners dictate it.
I'm a TERRIBLE liar. It shows on my face!

Lori said...

I guess sometimes it's a fine line between lying and trying to be polite and save someone's feelings. But an outright lie is a terrible thing. You are right, we tend to tell them more and more these days. Hope you are feeling better soon and over your allergies.

Chatty Kelly said...

I try to make it a point not to lie. One day a telemarketer called for my husband and I said "he isn't here." (he was.) My daughter said "Why did you lie?" WHAT?? I didn't even consider it a lie, because of who I lied to - a telemarketer. OOPS - talk about justification.

I think lying can be a crutch. Instead of saying "I like this meal" you can say "Thank you so much for the time & effort put into the meal." If asked point blank "did you like it." You can say "Well, my favorite dish is the XYZ dish you make." If pushed, well you have to either say "it wasn't my favorite" or something. Not "It made me want to puke."

But I do try to be characterized as a person who is truthful. But we all fall down sometimes. Thank God for his mercy.

Chatty Kelly said...

Okay, I just thought of something. If you read a post and get nothing out of it, I guess it's a like to write "Great post." Or something. LOL! Whoops - busted again.

Katherine Aucoin said...

One thing that was drilled in our heads growing up by my parents was they didn't like liars and they didn't like sneaks. I've drilled thins into my children's heads too. I don't care what everyone else does, but an outright lie is TOTALLY unacceptable.

Hope your allergies get better and you can stay awake and blog a little more. :)

Becky said...

I hate it when I catch my kids in a lie. It is such a betrayal of trust. I'm pretty blunt most of the time unless I know someones feelings will be smashed by the truth. But a lie is a lie. I made my pastor's wife lie to protect the details of a surprise party... so not only have I lied I have forced others to do so.

Part of living in a depraved world I suppose.

Robin @ Be Still and Know said...

You want to know how I can tell if my son (19 years old) is lying to me.....his lip are moving.

As one who is a seasoned veteran of living with deceit, I can speak from a slightly different perspective.

When you are dealing with a person who lies all the time you have to be very careful to be as transparent as possible. I must in all my dealing with my son be totally honest and above board, along with his tendency for deceit is a keen eye to spot the least little bit of deception no matter how small it may be on my part.
It is a very difficult balance to maintain.
Lying is never the answer, and that is not to say that a lie has never passed my lips because I am just as guilty as the next person in letting the occasional untruth slip past my lips.

I will say that when you deal with a lier on a daily basis is puts your perspective for tolerating lying and your tendency to do it in a very different light.

Edie said...

I think it's all due to global warming. LOL!

Seriously, I hate lying. Not that I've never told a lie before but it's not too often, partly because I hate when I do something that is not pleasing to God, and partly because I'm a terrible lier... lyer...I stink at lying. You can so tell if I'm even thinking about telling a lie so why humiliate myself.

Scarlet said...

I'm not a good liar, I don't have a poker face and I sleep better at night when I tell the truth. Having said that, I understand that others don't necessarily feel the way I do about lying; however, it still upsets me when I'm lied to. I don't ever ask, "Do I look fat in these jeans?" unless I'm ready to hear the truth! :)

I do believe that a little lie can grow into a big mess and it's better to avoid the subject you would be lying about altogether than to fib. That's my HONEST opinion...and btw, Greg, I hope you feel better!!

Jeannie said...

I rarely lie. I'm not good at it at all. Not to mention that the truth is on the tip of my tongue while a lie never is. I don't do things that get me in trouble as a rule so I don't have to lie about it. If I make a mistake, I own up. It's easier. I don't like to hurt feelings. I have lied but prefer to be constructive: I liked it better when your hair was such and such. I don't think that dress is cut right for your figure. Such and such is you - but it wouldn't work for me. Sometimes I am blunt and honest too.
My children laugh at me because I don't lie. Sometimes my husband gets angry with me.
Doesn't matter. It's still easier to tell the truth.

Marla said...

I'm sure everyone has told a lie at some time in there lives. I try not to lie. I had to tell my team of managers a little white lie one day when someone aasked me something. I wasn't supposed to let them know about it at the time. I felt so guilty I walked outside and prayed about it! I have also told a telemarketer that Marla was not at home.

B His Girl said...

That is a very interesting post. Really. Sometimes we leave things out of our replies on purpose and it puts a different slant on a situation. I don't think God color codes our lies(white lies) and downgrades some to fibs. Our tongue gets all of us in trouble and that is the truth. I better stop with that. Happy New Year Greg!

Sandy said...

Well....just a little fib...yea yea...I'm guilty. I don't like to hurt people.

enjoyed your post...sorry about the cat and the allergies..

Now was that the truth or a little fib just cause you were too lazy to update your blog. ha!

Wanda said...

Remember the Movie "Liar, Liar" Wonder what life would be like if we HAD TO TELL THE TRUTH!!!

Our Memory Verse this week says "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." John 8:31-32

Good post Greg....And that the truth!!!

Belle (from Life of a...) said...

I just had a conversation with somebody about this yesterday. We were talking about how people will make up false illness to take a sick day rather than a vacation day from work. I just can't lie...don't know why...maybe it was my parents...maybe it's just me. I can be sarcastic, snarky, overeat, and gossip, but I can't lie!

Anonymous said...