There’s Gold in them tharr hills.

That’s right, Gold prices are at their highest level in years and if you are selling, “Cash for Gold” is buying. All you have to do is call the number on your screen and we will send you a handy return envelope. It is safe, reliable and easy. Simply put your unwanted or broken Gold in the envelope and return it to us and we will send you back cash.

Translation:

Desperation is at its highest level in years. So if you have gold and you are desperate enough to put it in a marked envelope and send it through the mail where hundreds of people will have the opportunity to steal it, and by chance we do get it, we will send you back a fraction of what it is worth. It’s as simple as that. Count me in.

Invest in Gold. Yes it is true that Gold prices are at their highest level ever and the prediction is that they will go even higher. This prediction however comes from the same person who said that the Dow would never go below 10,000 again and then changed that number to 8,000 and then 7500 and is now saying 7000. I predict that it may go below 7000 today so if you want to invest some of your money, sent it to ME and I will get rid of it invest it for you. You may not become wealthy, but I might and doesn’t that give you a nice warm feeling to know that you did something nice for me? Just kidding.

So about that Gold rush…... Have you heard the news? California, which just happens to be the Golden State, is going to legalize marijuana. That’s their solution to the money crisis. By legalizing it, they can tax it and the state will get out of debt. Wow, now why didn’t I think of that? But why stop there Governor Arnold. Why not legalize prostitution as well and that way you can tax it. And here is a good idea for you. Why not sell day passes to illegal aliens from Mexico so that they can come to California and work for pennies? You could have them bring the Acapulco Gold in for you, let them work for almost nothing and then send them home at the end of the day. Talk about a “Bail” out opportunity. We will call it the “California Bail In plan.”

“Eureka I found it.”

Did you know that “Eureka I found it” is the California motto? Back in the 50’’s they wanted to have a state motto and someone suggested “In God we trust”. However the state legislature decided to go with Eureka I found it instead of In God we Trust in recognition of the California Gold Rush. So what they said was Gold was more important to them than God. And that my friends is what is wrong with California and for that matter America. We need a spiritual bailout plan, not a financial bailout plan.

Have a Golden Day,
Greg