A word to the wise (wise men that is)
Yes, Valentie's Day is just around the corner and don’t be fooled like I once was into believing that the statement; “let’s not get anything for each other” really means how it sounds. They say that just to test you and if you do fall for it, you failed. Failing this test is like the groundhog seeing his shadow only it means an entire year of cold if you get my drift.
Now most of us like to think "practical gifts" but Valentine,s is no time to be practical. This is the one holiday that you only get one shot at. I know a gift like this seems like the right thing to give:
But take it from me. Anything that has to do with cleaning is a big no no as far as Valentine’s day presents go.
Also on the practical side, are gifts that you yourself might get some use out of. For instance:
I know, who wouldn’t love one of those beauties but for some reason women don’t like them.
So where does that leave us? Same old same old gifts; Candy, Flowers, Cards, Teddy bear, Naming a star after her? Hmmmmm that last one gave me an idea. And since I am determined to make a Million Dollars this year, I have developed that lame idea into something super spectacular.
Let’s face it. Stars are millions of miles away, and some of them have already burned out (or so they say). That’s like giving her a burned out lightbulb for a present. You know how big that would go over. No I have a much better idea and here it is. (drum roll please)
You could name a squirrel after her. That’s right, a squirrel. Think about it. What is more cute and cuddly than a little grey squirrel? Forget about the fact that they are rodents. Look how cute this one is:
So here is how it works. You send me: not $100, not $50 but only $29.95 plus shipping and handling of course and I will name a squirrel after your loved one. In addition to naming the squirrel after her, I will send along a lovely photo like this:
But wait. You also get this certificate of authenticity.
So don’t delay. Act today. Send me money. The love you save may be your own.
No squirrels were harmed in the making of this add. Please allow one week for delivery. Void where prohibited by law. Not valid in areas where there are no squirrels. Please be kind to animals even if they are rodents. And have a great day,
Greg
PS: ladies, if you are still reading this, shame on you. But no need to thank me. Just call me Cupid.
Comments
I know you can't watch videos at work, but check out this commercial when you get a chance. It's about giving the "wrong" gift - it is hysterical!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SecVCh9dg4I
Thank you for the squirrel. It was so thoughtful and the most unique gift I have ever received. You shouldn't have. REALLY.
Actually, I need that practical gift in photo #2. I wouldn't complain if I got one.
We have a HERD of squirrels already. ONLY name my honey wants to give them is GO AWAY!
Do you need some more? I can help.
BTW, women never listen, and when you tell us to stop reading, that's when we will most likely read on!! He he!!
Sonya
you're too funny!
I'll be curious to hear how many takers you get...
I am actually one of those weird women who would love a new vacuum but the chainsaw would be pushing it.
You are too funny!
A squrrel is a French word meaning, take the wife on a vacation to the Maldives for 2 weeks with champagne and hibiscus flowers on the pillow. I'm surprised none of you have heard squrrel before.
and about the star being burnt out and the comparison to a light bulb, brilliant...
And just yesterday there was an ad on TV about this bird feeder with a revolving bottom stand, that when the squirrel grabs on sends him off into orbit!!! A bird can land without incident. Well that video was equally hilarios. Thanks
Seriously, my husband and I are usually practical when it comes to gifts...we can't help it!
Yah, this is the one holiday not to buy us practical stuff. The one day where we actually get to feel like princesses. :) I wonder if I will get anything.......
Actually, we really don't celebrate Valentine's Day -- no specific reason. It's like Halloween and even the Fourth of July. If we didn't do it as children we never carried it onwards over here. Even Thanksgiving was a long time coming at our house. Once the children arrived, all that changed of course, but we were married six years before we had children and starving students before that. Having been born into war time Britain, anything that cost more than we were used to was abandoned. I still can't throw food away without a twinge of conscience.
No judgement implied -- we're just weird.
When I was a young girl we used to play house with cut off squirrels' tails. We made little beds for them out of jewelry boxes. I know strange... I blame my older sister for introducing me to it....
Thanks for stopping by my blog and reading and commenting. I think you are the 4th man who has read and commented in a year. You are a brave soul.
Your words that you left me, blessed me.
My favorite animal is the sloth. Can The Reverend name a sloth after me? Well, on second thought, that may be seen as a kind of cut instead of something positive.
You idea is a good one.
Would you be willing to put tracking chips in the squirrels so we can track our namesakes?
If you find that your squirrel hasn't moved for a few hours, chances are it was hit by a car or something.
Dead squirrels will bring you some repeat business!
:-)
Thank you for the laugh, I needed that. And I'm linking you today.
Blessings,
Pam
Joshua 1:9